Day #100

“If you don’t like something, change it. If you can’t change it, change your attitude.” ― Maya Angelou

“My actions are my only true belongings.”
― Thich Nhat Hanh

Day #100.

I did it!

Day #99

I needed to go to the doctor's today. Nothing serious. Ethan went to work with Doug, attending his class. Doug told me Ethan laughed at his jokes and listened intently. While it's pretty cool that Ethan gets to sit in on a computer science graduate class, it's their bond that really makes me happy. I've shared that a few times over these #100HappyDays but it's worth revisiting and celebrating again.

Day #98

Ethan: Mom, hold my thumb.
Me, holding, then giving a gentle squeeze--a kind of thumb hug.
Ethan: There's something about that that's so comforting.

I love learning those little things about the people I love.

Day #97

I was pulling into our driveway from dropping Doug off at work this morning when my young neighbour friend ran over to say hello. He's been my artist buddy for years. He was home because his parents have opted him out of the standardized tests, and today is the first day. He told me he hates the tests. I asked him if he wanted to bring home a big blank canvas to work on. He said "Sure!" He was very excited. He's been asking me for one of my large blank canvases for some time. It felt so good to watch him carry it home across our muddy yards. I ran over to see if he would let me take his picture. Again he said "Sure." I didn't need a picture. It is a moment I will remember for a long time. But I wanted to share it and add it to the final days of my #100HappyDays.

Day #96

Checking things off my list of things I need to do.

Day #95

One of the best parts about being a not-very-worldly person is that I have the opportunity to learn lots of new things every day.  Something that's been a long process of learning for me (and is still a work in progress) is understanding that confidence is not arrogance, and humility is not insecurity. That might seem obvious to most, but it's been subtle for me. Extreme examples are clear, of course. It's those inconspicuous ones that still get me.

When I was 21, I got a Haida thunderbird tattoo on my lower leg. I was in Vancouver, BC, with a close friend. We had just driven across the country for the first time (first of five for me--two return trips, and one final one-way with Doug) in an old Chevette in which we had to stop at regular intervals to fill the oil and the transmission fluid, change three blown tires with around eitght unmatching bolts, and figure out the source and solution of a steaming radiator in the badlands while a storm brewed on the horizon.

Anyway, the tattoo has it's wings close to it's body. The tattoo artist told me it was suppose to symbolize humility and strength. I liked that, so I chose it. So, this humility and confidence thing has been something I've been thinking about and working on for a long time. One would think I'd have made more progress by now. But I'm learning. I'm learning! And learning makes me happy.

Day #94

This was so fun. We finished our projects today. Ethan said it is the most beautiful thing he has ever made. He loved soldering. I hoped he might. Now we have a couple more mementos to bring with us on our next adventure.

Day #93

A photo of me and my dad from I-don't-know-how-long ago. I just found out his colon cancer has returned, but my brother said the doctor sounded positive. So, I believe I have about a week left to my #100HappyDays challenge. Today I'm happy I found this picture of us. I love his smile here. He looks happy.

Day #92

Last night I was feeling a bit grumpy by the time I was ready to go to sleep. I was really tired yet restless at the same time. That combination makes me a bit edgy. A bit cranky too. I told my husband and son I was going to get a shower, then head to bed. I told them they'd have to be quiet because I was planning on sleeping in the living room to give them some space in case I snored again with my cold. I kind of barked that last bit about being quiet. Like I said, I was grumpy.

When I got out of the shower, I found my bed in the living room all nicely made, the lights turned down dim, and two warm smiles greeted me. Sandra Dodd has a whole page dedicated to thoughts on service. I'll link it in the comments. I haven't read the whole thing, but I've read a bit here and a bit there, taking away new parts to think about every time I perused. Last night, as I looked across the room at the thoughtfully made bed, I thought of the concept of service. After I climbed into my bed, with the covers pulled up high, I reflected on how sweet it felt to me to be so unconditionally served, even (and maybe especially) when I had not been very sweet myself. I thought about how easy it would have been for both Doug and Ethan to be grumpy back at me. But they weren't. They chose not to. They chose to make my life a little easier. A little nicer. To let me know they loved and cared about me a whole lot.

It's not new to me to give to another this way, but it was new for me to receive the service of another so openly and so humbly. I could tell my sincere appreciation of their gesture, though not expressed with many words or gushy sentiment (that's just not me), felt really good to both of them. I think I'm feeling a bit raw right now, so that probably contributed to my openness. There have been some very sad events in my periphery, and my life is in a state of change, and has been for some time, which can be a bit disorienting for me. Still, it seems all things lined up just right for me last night to experience something new and simply profound. There is a goodness in people that can be expressed most honestly and most completely when we are open to receive it. And, service given without strings has got to be one of the most beautiful gifts we can give.

Day #91

Ethan and I went out for lunch today, then decided to drive by the lake to take some photos. It was cold, but the conversation was warm.

Day #90

A knock at our door.

Ethan: Hi.
Friend: Hi.
Ethan: Wanna play outside?
Friend: Yes! I was hoping we could resume our game from yesterday!
Ethan: Okay!

That ease. An easy #100HappyDays.

Day #89

I've picked up some really great art from some very talented artists here in Ithaca. Unfortunately I've already packed some of the found art sculptures, so I'm not able to share photos of those right now. I've left some decent art of my own here in a few homes too. Both those things make me very happy.

Day #88

Foiling the edges of coloured glass. I enjoy this part of the project.

Day #87

Happy for the little things that are easy to take for granted, like a popsicle stick, the colour red, a well worn nightgown, the sun that peeks out from dense grey clouds for a short moment after a long winter, the ease of capturing a moment no matter how trivial, and the choice to make that moment meaningful.

Day #86

I'm sure I've shared this already for my #100HappyDays, but it's something that regularly brings me joy--these two friends who spend time together so generously.

Day #85

There was a light knock at my door. The little girl who lives next door wanted to know if she could pick our flowers because hers were still covered with snow. Of course I said "Sure!" She told me she was making a nest for the birds and invited me to come and see. Those little sticks in front and back are held in place with mud, and are there so the babies don't fall out. So sweet. I'm so glad she came over.

Day #84

I was feeling a bit restless today so I decided to take a tour of our town, taking pictures of some of our public/street art. It was snowing off and on while I was out and about, but the excitement of my treasure hunt kept me warm.

Day #83

We had plans to go to New York City this week, but Ethan came down with the nasty bug I had a couple of weeks ago, so we decided to stay home. After a couple very uncomfortable days, Ethan is feeling better.

Day #82

Doug called this a functional clock because of the function keys as numbers. He brought it home from his trip. He thought I'd love the whimsy. He was right.

Day #81

I like this broom. I like to see the dust bunnies disappear under it. I like how the filter used on this photo lets me believe it's not really snowing outside right now.

Day #80

Got to play at the ball pit again before we leave Ithaca!